The Waiting Game

In this time of uncertainty, it easy to get antsy and jump the gun.

The feeling I have hated the most in this life in not knowing what lies ahead. I have been a born planner but God has made sure that my story isn't written by me but Him.

I have stolen the spotlight and ran with the pen so I could get my edits and rewrites in. But now for the first time in my life, I'm completely helpless. I can only rely on Him for my future and it scares me everyday. I know that I will be okay and I know that God will provide but my human mind struggles to grasp that I can not do anything.

I know that if I lean on God's understanding and not my own I will be okay. It's all a waiting game. Patience is key. I keep thinking of Daniel and how he had to pray for 21 days straight night and day for him to finally receive his answer. The difference with Daniel and myself, other than the fact he was one really holy dude, but during this time he cried out and prayed to give the Angel strength to reach him with the answer. I on the other hand have been struggling with fasting each week. I realize that this all comes down to me. How am I seeking God is all this? How am I truly crying out? The truth is I even need help in this as well. So here's me confessing, I need help in it all, not just the future but now in the midst of silence.

God I need you now. Help me.